Yesterday here in the ‘boro of Greens it was another semester kicking off at UNCG. Which means the gatherings of campus ministry. I spent most of the morning with fellow friends spread out about campus handing out flyer’s informing others of our gatherings on Monday evenings to worship and celebrate the creator of the universe. The only problem is it drives me crazy.
I think its because I think too much. As I stand in the masses of people I stand constantly questioning. Who do I approach? What do I say? How come I didn’t approach the person that just passed me? Should I approach people on cell phones? Do I want to interrupt? Is Jesus more important then a phone call? More important to them anyway? Is He important to me? Are these people important to me? Do they care? Do I care? Is it okay if I don’t care? Does Jesus find this as impersonal as I do? How can I possibly talk to all these people? Four more people just walked behind me because I’ve been talking to this person for the last 5 minutes! Did I just send them to hell? Now to mention the constant feeling in the pit of my stomach that makes me feel like i am in some way prostituting Jesus.
Which I think was really my problem. Now, I’m all about reaching the lost. Im pretty confident its the only reason to be a follower of The Way. However as much has I hate cliche’s is this really what Jesus would have done? Furthermore I’m not one of those people that feels if you don’t do everything the way Jesus did it your wrong. However, there are two things in my mind that Jesus was always about. The lost and relationships and intertwining the two. Jesus never handed out flyers… because everyone does that. There is nothing relational or life giving about it. Instead He would share a meal, His time, He would share His gifts. Jesus was always about sharing His life. and Life always comes through personal relationships whether it be Jesus or anyone else.
Spiritual prostitution as I will call it in this blog is when we present God… without actually presenting God. Kind of like sex presents love… without actually presenting love. Sure we presented God on a card… But did it make any relational difference in the lives of the people that threw the invitation away? Did we really go out of our way to reach the lost… Or did we just make it more convenient? Are we really showing them The Way, The Truth, and The Life?
As some of you may know David Crowder*Bands Remedy Club Tour was filmed in two locations this past year. New York and Atlanta. They decided to take these films to the big screen. So for one night, in one theater, in a bunch of different cities the band was on the big screen.
Most of you know that My love for this band goes deep, so of course I went to see it. A lot of the reason I love them is because they are extremely original and entirely entertaining. Maybe this sounds like all the wrong reasons to like a worship band… But I think our definition of worship in American church is probably wrong. My view is someone or something can be entertaining and entertainment can be an act of worship as long as the glory is going to God. Because that is worship… Finding the glory of God in all circumstances. However, this is totally off topic and an entirely different blog. (I just wanted to explain myself)
Anyway during the concert in theaters he told this really impacting story. In which him and a friend were having a conversation about compassion and justice. His friend said that compassion is when you see a bunch of people drowning in a river to stop what your doing, jump in and save them. He went on to say the man looking for justice is the man willing to swim upstream to stop whoever keeps throwing the people in. He said that compassion is a reaction and justice is an action.
Sometimes I think the church spends too much time having compassion on the lost and reacting to the worlds injustice than they do acting upon the injustice and trying to stop it. I have indeed struggled with a lot of this for a while because I know in the end God is the only one who decides justice. However I think there are acts of love that can go a long way in ending much of the injustice our world has today. Its just a matter of leaving your pride behind and swimming upstream.
If you’ve ever worked retail you probably know the lengths people will go to get things they want. Things that obviously won’t last… but since its all about being trendy and new and fresh people will go to great lengths to find satisfaction in materialism.
There seems to be this pattern in retail… Atleast at Target. The pattern goes as follows, When Im standing around with nothing to do available to all the guests for all the help they need… No help is needed. However, the moment I preoccupy myself with something… Everyone needs help. Its quite an annoying trend really. In fact Im sure almost nothing makes me more annoyed at work.
I call it the “As long as the red shirt man with the answers is around I don’t have to panic” trend. The moment red shirt man is gone… everyone is lost… with no hope.
I feel like this is how we play God sometimes. We play him out to be the red shirt guy. The guy thats there with all the answers and so we’ll just go about life as we please until we cant seem to find what we want. Until we cant find whats going to make us happy. Then we plead with God that if He gives us just this one more thing we’ll do better. We’ll try harder. We’ll complain less and give more. We find ourselves frantically hitting the assistance button for red shirt man to come save the day…
However the truth is, the worst thing God could do is give you what you think you want… Or maybe what you think you need. Because your soul needs God. And Him giving you anything less is a lie. Today I found myself in one of the most satisfying worship moments of life. I was red shirt man being pissed off at all our needy guests, desperately wanting them to leave me alone or better yet to just be out of work. Secretly complaining in my head and being bitter. Generally when my soul aches I learn truth. The truth God pounded in today was that my circumstances don’t need to change, my heart does. Secretly my soul was longing for God… and I was replacing it with everything else.
Today I was a desperate consumer like I am everyday whoring my soul around to whatever might simply satisfy me for fleeting moments. However God stands above all calling out to us desperately wanting us to accept His love. Its a call to freedom, a call for the weight to be lifted from shoulders. Much like the weight that was lifted tonight. A call to be joyous, hopeful, and giving in all things. A call to love others the way God loves us.
I’m sad to report that little Augustine didn’t make it through his second night of rehab. He died early this morning around 1:30. Last night he was quickly losing all desire to live… and I wasn’t very optimistic about the outcome this morning. He put up a heck of a fight though. I know a lot of humans that don’t live through getting hit by speeding cars needless to say newborn bunnies. This evening we’re going to have a burial for the little guy in my backyard to conclude Augustine’s presence in our lives. Though short we made the most of it.
Last night Karen and I went for a walk around Greensboro. We never really have a set route, we like to “let the spirit lead”. Often times are walks are quite lengthy but last night was quite different. Not in the sense of length… but different in the sense of what the subject of are walk became about. Usually its a time of quiet, to talk, share thoughts spend quality time together, and excersise. Last night however became a rescue mission. On our way home we came across a bunny that we had not noticed when we had previously walked that way. It was in the road… lying lifeless… as apparently it had been hit by a car. Now, just to preface I have wanted a wild bunny as a pet for a long time. Not a domestic bunny because thats just to normal. I wanted a wild one. Well, after a minute of looking at the little guy we saw him squirm. Catching us off guard we pondered somewhat frantically for a few minutes to figure out what to do. I ran across the street and grabbed an empty Hardees bag I found laying in the grass. We put the rabbit in the bag and carried him home. He bled from the mouth and eye for a while and laid in a shoe box unable to stand up at all for the first couple hours we had him. As the night went on he began to actually eat and stand. Throughout most of today His health has steadily increased in what seemed to be a small miracle of life. However the last hour or two have been rough for him. He’s gone back to looking lifeless in his cage and unable or even desirous to try and stand. I was optimistic in the sense that maybe he was just tired but unless hes narcoleptic I’m thinking not. Anyway his name is Augustine and I’m hoping his little miracle story isn’t going to end tonight.
